Things I’m Hoping to Avoid in 2017

It’s a new year and like most people I am happy to see 2016 go. Most people take advantage of the new year by wiping their slate clean and setting some goals for themselves. While I do have goals for myself, I thought it would be much more interesting to go in a different direction. 2016 really threw a lot of crap at me that I didn’t want any part of. Maybe you felt the same? In 2017 I’m hoping to swerve left and avoid that shit and some bad habits I picked up along the way. So today I am bringing you a few of the things I’m hoping to avoid this year.

  1. Ranting About My Best Friend’s Sucky Boyfriend 
    To be honest, I’m surprised I have not blogged about this because it is something that I constantly talk about in real life. One of my best friends started dating this guy at the very end of 2015. They had a long distance relationship at the start of 2016 and now he’s back home for good. I’m not going to get into all of the details but basically they have an unhealthy relationship and I am not his biggest fan. It’s not that he’s a terrible person, I just don’t think he’s right for her. I also don’t like the fact that he’s judgmental. There’s actually a lot of things that I have issue with. Okay, I need to stop going into to detail because then this post will be over 2000 words long. You don’t want that, I don’t want that.Anyway…most of my friends and family are sick of hearing me rant about this. I’m sick of ranting about it because I’ve realized it’s not healthy for me. Also, me telling my best friend is not doing anything. She has to make her own choices and come to realize things on her own. I’ve got my own love life to deal with. So avoiding ranting about their relationship will be better for everyone!
    Raise your hand if you have put off doing something you planned on doing in 2016 and never got to it. I expect to see a lot of hands here. I see you fellow procrastinators, I see you. Just so you know both of my hands are raised, that’s how bad I’ve been with procrastination this year.When I graduated from college a few years back I thought there would be less stuff to procrastinate in the “real world.” Turns out there’s just as much if not more. I have been a bad writer, a bad creative project starter, and a bad job applier. At the start of the year I had a few creative projects I wanted to either start or finish. I did not meet any of my goals. This year I need to finish something and get serious about the things I want to do. There is no time like the present. While I know there will be things I put off, I’m hoping to avoid procrastinating less frequently.
  3. Stupid Arguments
    This election year just brought the worst out in everyone! While I was good at avoiding fights on Facebook and social media, I was less good at about avoiding these arguments in real life. It would start off as an regular discussion and then all of a sudden BAM! I found myself in the middle of an argument that either started from a stupid reason, was over something stupid, or was just stupid in general. It would be one thing if by the end of this argument all parties involved came to some sort of understanding, but usually that never happened. What I’ve learned, especially this year, is that when someone is very passionate about something you’re not going to change their mind. 2017 I plan to avoid getting involved with stupid arguments because they are stupid for a reason. It’s unnecessary. Instead I will spend these efforts on productive actions. Actions are what really matter.
  4. Even Stupider People
    This goes hand in hand with stupid arguments. I’m a pretty easy going person and tend to give everyone a chance. Which I will continue to do, but once people have proven to be stupid or are not worth my time, I’m not going to deal with them. I don’t need these people in my life, you probably don’t need them. In fact, nobody needs the people, so let’s all collectively avoid them!
  5. Worrying So Much About Other People’s Shit
    A problem that I seem to find myself in a lot is getting really involved with other people’s drama and problems. Again, I’m a nice person and I care about my friends. I want to be there for them and help them. However, I don’t need to disregard my shit for their shit. Or more accurately, let their shit take over my life. I gotta deal with my own shit and stop disregarding it. If I don’t, it will just pile up and I’ll be swimming in this giant pool of shit which sounds awful. I need to avoid this giant pool and worrying so much about my friends shit in general.
  6. ….Falling All Over The Place
    Okay, you knew this was coming right? This final one had to be obvious. While I do like the fact that these clumsy moments make life more interesting, the bruises that come with them are not fun. It would be nice if I could avoiding falling all over the place and only in just some places instead.

Those are six things I’m looking to avoid this upcoming year. If you couldn’t tell what I really want out of this year is to focus on my own personal goals. Those are kinda important. Feel free to leave comments down below of your goals or things you’re looking to avoid in 2017. Happy New Year!

P.S. I almost put a few certain people on my “Avoid List” but decided to avoid the potential drama that could come from this lol

Navigating My Writing Woes

Hello, my dear blog. It’s been an extremely long time. Fear not, for I am back with the intention of updating this more frequently. I have been busy with creative projects, traveling, work, and getting my shit together. While my shit is more together than it was, I have a long way to go. Anyway…ON WITH TODAY’S TOPIC WHICH IS WRITING!

One of the goals I set for myself quite frequently is to write more. Not only blog posts, but also work on my creative projects. I am the process of writing a book! Something I have been working on for the past 2 years which is so crazy! You’d think, “Wow Becky, you’ve spent two years working on this thing, you must be in the editing stages or almost finished.” You would be completely wrong…

Gosh this is so embarrassing to admit, but I have not even reached the halfway point yet! GAAHHH!  Part of the reason why I’m sucking at putting in the work is I am so god damn lazy. There’s also my TV addiction, writer’s block, and the fact that I’m working on other creative projects. I know, I know! I need to get a grip! Writing is hard though guys. I think my biggest problem is I don’t always know how to execute the many ideas I have, which is where the writers block comes in. Also, I’m just so fucking lazy.

With 2017 fast approaching, I’ve made a decision to just sit down and get to work. There are many things that I want to do creatively aside from finishing this goddamn book and I’m just going to do them. Here is a short list of my current creative project goals:

  2. Write more comedy sketches
  3. Come up with a stand-up routine (I want to be a comedian)
  4. Make a video
  5. Blog more, obviously!

Instead of waiting for 2017 to actually arrive, I will be starting today. One of the things I try to live by is “No day but today.” If there’s something in your life that you’ve been meaning to do, here is your push to just do it. There is no time like the present.

P.S. Sorry if this post sucks! It’s been a while and I need to get back into this whole blogging thing.


Follow Up: I SAW BERMUDA BOY (aka Al)

Alright, so this post is like 5 months overdue, but after rereading an old post and a goal to blog more about my life, I’ve decided I need to update you on Al aka Bermuda Boy aka my old crush.  If you’re not sure who I’m talking about, I recommend reading my blog post “Lori the Most Inspirational Waitress To Have Ever Lived.”  Here is quick version for those of you that don’t remember and are too lazy to go back:

Basically I reconnected with my old crush Al, code name Bermuda Boy, last year.  He invited me to go party in Bermuda and I DIDN’T GO!  Even though my friends and Lori, the best waitress I’ve ever had, said that I should have gone.  Recently (well back in August), I saw Lori again and had to confess my short comings.

Ironically a few days after I saw Lori, my mom told me that Bermuda Boy and his family were going to be in town.  That’s right, I saw him again.  Face to face.  Gosh, it was something to say the least.

Alright, so a few pieces of information that you need to know before I fully get into this.  Things I was aware of going into this re-meeting, thank you Facebook.  Al is a taken man, has been for more than a year now.  He did not stay single long, in fact he got together with this girl around the time I would have gone to Bermuda.  Maybe I dodged some heartbreak by not going, who knows.  That being said, I was still super excited and extremely nervous to see him again.

Do you have those people that you’ve met on occasion and wish you were better friends with?  I certainly do and Al is one of them.  When we last saw each other 6 years ago we just clicked.  I can’t explain it but even though he’s someone I rarely see, we really connect on a deep level.  It sounds crazy I know.  To be honest, I was 90% sure it was all in my head.  I was a dorky kid in high school and kind of a hopeless romantic.  Here was this cute, super cool guy that was around my age and was giving me the time of day.  That was what I remembered about Al.  I really wasn’t sure if high school me had seen things that weren’t there because she liked the idea of it.  Think about it, up until last year I had no contact with him.  He was friendly, but he could just be a nice guy.  He helped me with what I needed to know and then we went back to our lives.  Hadn’t talked to him much since.  This was the first time I was going to see how much of this stuff I had made up in my head was true.

Gosh I was so nervous that I delayed talking to him as soon as we got to the restaurant.  I, of course, happened to find their family first at the bar when we got there.  It was a surprise to say the least after hearing my mom talk about how they were always late.  I said a quick hello, hugged his parents, and literally went off to find my mom to tell her.  Although as everyone regrouped I had to face him.  We said our hello’s and once the ice was broken we literally did not stop talking.

It was like we had been friends forever and just hadn’t seen each other in a while.  I mean I’ve known him all of my life but we were never close.  Just family friends, ya know?  It was so easy to talk to him and we talked about everything.  I even confessed to him about how I was ready to hop on a plane to Bermuda for cupmatch last year but chickened out because I didn’t have anyone to go with.  He told me that I should have said something and came anyway.  He also insisted that one year I had to come and had an open invitation since he and his family were always going to be there for the event.  Our conversation even got deep as we talked about the troubles of being a twenty-something out of college.  My high school self was not making our clear connection up.  Al was really someone I connected with, which is hard to find.

If the fact that we basically talked and stuck by each the entire time wasn’t enough to convince me that I wasn’t crazy, his dad pulled my mom aside and basically said that this was the most he’s ever seen Al talk ever. Ever!  I sometimes forget that Al can be a quiet guy because we get along.  However, that is a statement.  Maybe there’s hope for us in the end.  If not that’s okay, I’d settle for good friends too.  The two of us just need to be better about keeping in touch and stop being so shy.

P.S. Thankfully the restaurant we ended up at was not the same one that Lori worked out.  She definitely would have remembered me and gone into the story basically telling everyone at the table that I had a crush on Al.  Now that would have been REALLY AWKWARD!

My Cousin’s Not So Secret Girlfriend

Both sides of my family are big gossipers.  A staple rule is that if you’re not at the family event, we will talk about you.  I don’t know how accurate that is though because they definitely talk about you when you’re there.  However, when you’re not there you cannot control the conversation or shut it down.  This is why I try to be there so I can control the gossip.  My cousin Brian on the other hand, has not learned this.

Since Facebook has become so popular, as a twenty-something you deal with the fact that your semi-stalker family is on it and friends with you.  This does not bother me that much because I don’t post a lot on Facebook, this is what blogs and Twitter are for.  Brian on the other hand could use some work with his Facebook skills.

He started to get tagged in a lot of pictures with the same woman named Elizabeth.  Some of them were more risque than others.  Since he was tagged in them, everyone in the family could see.  Once they saw they couldn’t help but gossip.  My uncle Toto and my cousin’s wife Jess were the worst by far.  My Aunt Laurie, who is married to Toto, referred to them as giggling school girls which is an accurate depiction.  Everyone thought they were dating and was so curious.  So my family did what they do best and went right to the source.

Poor Brian, I feel for the kid.  He got drilled so hard about this women Elizabeth and denied any sort of relationship with her.  It settled the family down at the time.  The issue was put to rest until the amount of pictures he had with this Elizabeth just continued to pile up.  Everyone was still suspicious.

I gave Brian the benefit of the doubt.  While I suspected they were sleeping together, I took his word that they weren’t dating.

A little more than a year later, I go on Facebook like any person my age to check my notifications.  Lo and behold right at the top of my newsfeed is a post from Elizabeth, that Brian was tagged in, devoted to their one year anniversary.  To say my family went cray would an understatement.  There was even an email thread about it.  You can’t keep things from family, no matter how hard you try.  Poor Brian learned that the hard way.

To everyone out there, your family is definitely Facebook stalking you.  So either be careful what you post or get ready for the questions.

P.S. My dad, who is not on Facebook, hilariously found out weeks later in a passing conversation and was pissed that no one ever told him.  Brian still had one person fooled even after the bomb dropped.

Lori the Most Inspirational Waitress To Have Ever Lived

Have you ever received some amazing advice from an unlikely person or stranger?   Last year this happened to me while I was getting brunch with my friends at a restaurant.  I was kind of in a state of uncertainty at the time.

You see, I had this massive crush on this guy.  He’s my mom’s friend’s son, we’ll call him Al.  Al is a year younger than me, smart, funny, and someone I weirdly get along well with.  The problem, we don’t live in the same country.  He is from Bermuda, went to University in England, and I don’t know where he’s at now (it’s not America though).  The last time I saw him was roughly 6 years ago when his family was visiting mine in America.  Last year we became friends on Facebook and reconnected because my good friend Will was going on a cruise to Bermuda and wanted to know the hot spots.  Apparently, Will had picked the best time to go.

It was cupmatch which is a big deal in Bermuda and basically like a giant party.  Al literally sent me paragraphs upon paragraphs of awesome stuff that was happening that week.  I was super jealous that I wasn’t going to be in Bermuda, so much so that I told Al.  His response, “You should come!”

Not going to lie I’m 90% sure I collapsed on the ground after getting this message.  I mean can you blame me?  Here is this guy I had a crush on, who at the time was recently single, basically inviting me to go party in Bermuda.  I didn’t know what to do with myself.

This happened at the end of June, so for most of July I basically went back and forth on what I should do.  At first, my friend Marley and I were going to see if it were possible to join Will’s cruise.  That fell through, the cruise was way expensive and overbooked.  Then something came up with Marley, so it would just be me traveling there.  I also wasn’t sure how serious Al was and if this was actually a terrible idea.  As I stated earlier, I haven’t seen him in five years and we only just began talking again.  He’s a family friend but not someone I am super close with.  I could show up there and it be incredibly awkward.  I was so torn on what to do.

Fast forward to one day  when Will, my friend Jimmy, and I decided to have brunch at this place in the city.  Of course we talked about my dilemma because it was all I talked about that summer.  They both told me that I obviously had to go, but I was not convinced.  I couldn’t strike that feeling of paranoia.  It got to a point where my friend Will was just like “Let’s ask the waitress!”

Our waitress, Lori, was super sweet and very friendly.  She was a cross between Taylor Swift and Kristen Bell.  After Will told her my problem she gave me some of the best advice I have ever received.  It was so amazing that I won’t be able to do it justice.  Basically, she told me that I had to go.  She said you have to go for it because regardless of what happens with him, it’s a trip to Bermuda!  The trip alone will be an amazing experience and experiences are something you have to go for.  There was obviously more and it was worded better.  I almost cried after she lectured me about how risks are always worth taking.  It was beautiful, plus I had 3 mimosas in me which made me feel even more emotional.

Her advice and that whole experience is something I will never forget.  A few weeks ago, almost a year later, we went back to the restaurant and she happened to be our waitress again.  She even remembered Will and I and asked if I ended up going to Bermuda.  You’re probably curious too after that build up, hell I would be.

Unfortunately, it’s kind of a let down because I didn’t end up going.  Logistically I was having trouble working it out and was a BIG FAT CHICKEN and didn’t ask Al for ideas/help.  Even after Lori’s amazing advice, I was too scared of the bad things that might have happened.  I almost regret it now, but I subscribe to the belief that things happen for a reason.  Overall, I think this has taught me that I need to take more risks and just go for things.  Not taking risks leaves you with a boring life.  So in a month I will be taking a traveling journey to California, Seattle, and South Korea because why the fuck not.

Readers, I urge you to start living your life and just go for things.  You don’t want to be like me and sort of regret not traveling to an exotic island to hang out with someone you haven’t seen in a while because you were scared.  Don’t pass up opportunities.

P.S. I really hope that guy doesn’t stumble upon this page or at least this post.  Talk about an awkward way of someone finding out you had a huge crush on them.

Getting Into Trouble on Snapchat

Snapchat, oh snapchat.  Boy do you have embarrassing dirt on me.

Most of the time, I admit, I’m asking for it seeing as how I only really use the app when I’m drunk.  There’s just something about taking terrible selfies and videos that is so much fun when I’m plastered.  I have a great time and my friends get a kick out of it too (not to mention blackmail…).  Yesterday however, I was not prepared for what snapchat had dealt me.

Okay so like most single people in today’s world, I am on Tinder.  Let’s be real there’s something about matching with people that is fun and a huge confident boost.  I personally don’t take it too seriously.  That being said, I don’t troll around as much as others do.  Anyway, I started talking to this cute dude yesterday and we were being real flirty.  Like REAL flirty and escalated quickly. Not even kidding one second we’re talking about music and the next he’s saying he’s horny.

Usually at this point I’d roll my eyes and unmatch him or something, but it was jokey enough that I just went with it. I don’t know what had gotten into me.  I’m really not a sexual person.  Making out with someone is fun, but I’m not very experienced beyond that.  That being said everyone has days where they’re just hot and bothered and yesterday was one for me.

Thankfully I put a stop to this before things went too far.  I was meeting with my friends soon and I didn’t want this to go on while I was with them.  Talk about awkward.  I flat out said that our convo couldn’t get any more heated, not that it really was that heated, but you get me. Instead of being like see you later he some how convinces me that we should snapchat.

Again, usually I’d back out of this but for some reason  I said yes.  I’m not sure how much of it was his charm or how much I was out of it.  He assured me that he wasn’t just gonna straight up send me a dick pic because I was not about to get sexy on snapchat.  That is just not me.  He just liked using it more or something.  So he adds me and I say goodbye because I’m hanging out with my friends.

Later, I see that I have three snapchats from him.  I opened them with one of my best friend’s Mo because I was still kind of afraid of what they were going to be.  The first one was of him making a cute face.  Not gonna lie, I let out a huge sigh of relief.  The second was just like the first.  The third however, I just couldn’t believe.

No it wasn’t his dick, thank god.  But he took a mirror shot of of himself with him dragging the neck of his shirt down, trying (and sort of failing) to look sexy.  The caption was “Horny yet? ;)”  Not even kidding, I fell to the floor pissing my pants.  In hindsight, I should have been expecting this but it still surprised me.  I think what really made me die was the fact that he tried to look sex y and failed. I wish I saved the picture so you all could see but you’ll have to use your imaginations.  It was that good.  I almost wish he had sent another like it, it was too funny.

P.S. Have to say though he was definitely more attractive in his cute snapchats than his Tinder profile pics.  Go figure.

Bathroom Line Conversations

More often than not there is a line for the women’s bathroom.  There’s no avoiding it no matter how hard that you try.  I mostly mind my own business but sometimes you run into quite the characters waiting in that line or in the woman’s bathroom itself.

I bumped into one of these characters on my way to the bathroom yesterday.  It was a one stall bathroom and this old woman and I happened upon it at the same time.  She was very kind and asked if I had to go really bad.  I didn’t and told her to go ahead.  Side note, even if I had I probably would have still let her go first because I feel like it is an unwritten rule that you always gotta let the old lady go first.  So she goes and I wait.  When she gets out some time has passed but she felt that she took a long time so she apologizes to me.  The way she did it was so funny I had to share (though it is kind of tmi haha).  She says “I’m sorry, when you get older it dribbles out.”

I can’t even comment further, the statement speaks for itself.

P.S.  Old people are my favorite.  Literally you never know what’s going to come out of their mouth.  It’s why hanging out with my grandma is a ton of fun but also a little scary.